You Won’t Regret Living Your Values

When you think about the people you most admire, and that have made the biggest impact on your life – what is it about them that makes you feel this way?

This is one of the questions you can ask yourself to begin to understand your core values, and how they relate to how you want to show up at work.

As I introduce the topic of values to new clients, it can be a bit of a hard sell for them to see how this relates to bottom line results. It is much easier (for both of us, frankly) to stay on the surface and stick to defining explicit career goals. We definitely do that too, however as I have become a more seasoned coach, I see the results that come from clients who are willing to dig deeper.

My answer to the above “who do you admire” question is a great illustration of why the exercise is important. There are several people for me, however I’ll focus on one – an executive that I had worked with across 2 banks and many years who recently retired. When she posted her retirement message on LinkedIn, she received the largest response of support I have ever seen. She is universally respected and admired. And I know why – it’s because she did something remarkable which was stay consistent to her values over a very long career. When we talked about her career and retirement, I shared this quote from Adam Grant:

“Don’t define your success as what you have achieved. Define your success as living your values”.

As I reflected on my former corporate career in this conversation, I can’t say that I was living my values. I certainly (regretfully) sometimes acted in ways that were outside of my integrity, which is a value I now know that I hold dear.

So, here is where my pitch comes in on the importance of values work in coaching: if you don’t even know what your values are, how can you ensure you are living your values?

We can apply these identified core values immediately. Having a conflict with someone on your team? Need to tell someone a hard truth? Feel like your boundaries are being pushed?

What do your values tell you is the right way to proceed?

It's a legacy question, and one that I ask clients to reflect on: What do you want people to say about you at your retirement dinner, and even - what do you want people to say about you at the end of this week? The answer is important and making this hope a reality takes deliberate thoughtfulness and action.

So when we talk about values in coaching, think of it as a gift to your future self, and one that you may come to appreciate more than the career goals you identify and achieve.